Badass Of The Day - Fridtjof Nansen

On July 21, 1893, Fridtjof Nansen left his homeland of Norway on a ship called the Fram, meaning "forward," on a mission to explore the Arctic circle. At that time, Nansen was already an experienced adventurer, having written a book on the year he spent in Greenland.

The expedition's goal was to intentionally lodge the ship in the ice (the ship was reinforced) to explore the currents of the Arctic ice sheets. Accordingly, the Fram was decked out to allow the crew of 13 to stay warm, with insulation of felt, reindeer hair, cork shavings and tar. There was even a windmill to run electric lamps. They left with enough food for five years. As expected, the Fram became locked in the ice and followed the currents. He took pictures:

Early in the second year of the trip, it became apparent that the boat would not reach the North Pole, which had yet to be conquered. Accordingly, Nansen and a companion, Hjalmar Johansen, tried to reach the pole on three sleds with 28 dogs, in March 1895. They quickly ran into trouble, running out of supplies and butchering the weaker dogs to feed the stronger ones (gross).

Since Nansen has promised his wife that he would come home alive, they turned around just 226 miles south of the Pole, yet the highest that any human had ever made in 400 years of exploration. Since the ship was too far away, the two tried to go back to reach a distant island. They spent four months trying to make it to shipping lanes, killing off all the dogs and even eating a porridge made of canine blood.

They reached the island in August 1895, but realized they would have to spend the winter in the Arctic circle. They dug a hovel out of the ice and spent 9 months surviving on polar bear meat fried in walrus blubber, sharing a greasy sleeping bag. They were finally rescued at the next thaw, when they came across another explorer on his way to try to reach the pole (he didn't make it), who knew that Nansen might be in the area.

Nansen and Johansen returned home as heroes on August 13, 1896, more than three years after they left and just one week before the Fram returned home safely from its own trip. The Fram's trip was a striking success, remarkably without a single man lost, as it realized, for the first time, that there was no land in the Arctic and that it was, in fact, an ocean. Nansen became a celebrity, as well as an ambassador, and became something of a ladies man in his later years, after his wife passed away. He passed away in 1930, at the age of 69. The Fram is displayed prominently in Oslo, and children are read bedtime stories of his adventures.

Thanks, subscription to National Geographic!

What Song Is This? - Answer Key

Here are the answers. I've learned that you people SUCK at this, and that I have good taste in music. And yes, I say that with the full knowledge that Air Supply is on the list:

1. It used to seem to me that my life went on too fast, and I had to take things slowly, just to make the good times last. - "Back In The High Life," Steve Winwood (Good job, Corey)
2. Got no where but home to go. Got Ben Folds on my radio right now. - "Monkey," Counting Crows
3. Lucky I'm sane after all I've been through. Everybody sing, "I'm cool." "He's cool." I should not complain, but sometimes I still do. - "Life's Been Good," Joe Walsh
4. I realize the best part of love is the thinnest lies but it don't count for much, and I'm not letting to. I believe there's too much to believe in. - "Lost In Love," Air Supply
5. He came from somewhere back in her long ago. Sentimental fool don't see, trying hard to recreate what had yet to be created. - "What A Fool Believes," Doobie Brothers
6. Shyness is nice and shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to. - "Ask," The Smiths
7. I tried to discover a little something to make me sweeter. Oh baby, refrain from breaking my heart. - "Respect," Eurasure
8. Boy mercury, shooting through every degree. Oh girl dancing down those dirty and dusty trails. - "Roam," B-52s
9. Get yourself a lawyer and a gun. - "Red Light," The Strokes
10. We were supposed to go on and do much bigger things than we've done. With stitches and makeup, you'll hold it together for me. - "The Moviegoer," Matt Pond PA
11. Make a hole with a gun perpendicular to the name of this town in a desktop globe. - "Ana Ng," They Might Be Giants"
12. Me and my brother were talking to each other about what makes a man a man. - "Tattoo," The Who
13. I wanted to be with you alone and talk about the weather. - "Head Over Heels," Tears For Fears"
14. Laugh hard, it's a long way to the bank. I can't be blamed for nothing anymore. It's been a long time since you've been around. Laugh hard, it's a long way to the bank. - "Paper Thin Walls," Modest Mouse
15. The weekend in the college didn't turn out like you planned. The things that pass for knowledge I can't understand. - "Reelin' In The Years," Steely Dan
16. When she walks, she's like a samba that swings so cool and sways so gentle that when she passes, each one she passes goes oooo. - "Girl From Ipanema," Frank Sinatra (?)
17. Born to multiply, born to gaze into night skies. - "Australia," The Shins
18. Sittin' here resting my bones and this loneliness won't leave me alone. - "Dock Of The Bay," Otis Redding (it's about giving up)
19. I've got an electric guitar. I play my stupid songs. I write these stupid words, and I love every one. - "In The Garage," Weezer
20. When I had you to myself, I didn't want you around. Those pretty faces always always made you stand out in a crowd. - "I Want You Back," The Jackson 5 (Good job, Nilda!)

What Song Is This? - Expert Level

Just for fun, this one is extra hard. Good luck to all and remember, no googling!:

1. It used to seem to me that my life went on too fast, and I had to take things slowly, just to make the good times last.
2. Got no where but home to go. Got Ben Folds on my radio right now.
3. Lucky I'm sane after all I've been through. Everybody sing, "I'm cool." "He's cool." I should not complain, but sometimes I still do.
4. I realize the best part of love is the thinnest lies but it don't count for much, and I'm not letting to. I believe there's too much to believe in.
5. He came from somewhere back in her long ago. Sentimental fool don't see, trying hard to recreate what had yet to be created.
6. Shyness is nice and shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to.
7. I tried to discover a little something to make me sweeter. Oh baby, refrain from breaking my heart.
8. Boy mercury, shooting through every degree. Oh girl dancing down those dirty and dusty trails.
9. Get yourself a lawyer and a gun.
10. We were supposed to go on and do much bigger things than we've done. With stitches and makeup, you'll hold it together for me.
11. Make a hole with a gun perpendicular to the name of this town in a desktop globe
12. Me and my brother were talking to each other about what makes a man a man.
13. I wanted to be with you alone and talk about the weather.
14. Laugh hard, it's a long way to the bank. I can't be blamed for nothing anymore. It's been a long time since you've been around. Laugh hard, it's a long way to the bank.
15. The weekend in the college didn't turn out like you planned. The things that pass for knowledge I can't understand.
16. When she walks, she's like a samba that swings so cool and sways so gentle that when she passes, each one she passes goes oooo.
17. Born to multiply, born to gaze into night skies.
18. Sittin' here resting my bones and this loneliness won't leave me alone.
19. I've got an electric guitar. I play my stupid songs. I write these stupid words, and I love every one.
20. When I had you to myself, I didn't want you around. Those pretty faces always always made you stand out in a crowd.

Monday Night Football

Because the world needs to know about my busy weekend.

Dad, my brother-in-law Forrest, Andrew and I got tickets to the Eagles game in Philadelphia on Monday night. (Thanks, Skier!!) On Friday night, we went over to Matt & Lynn's awesome new house, where I learned that I apparently suck at flip cup. This means I need to play more flip cup, Nilda. Here's Matt getting ready for Santacon the next morning.

We woke up early on Saturday to rent a car to drive to Philadelphia for the Flyers/Penguins game, my birthday present from Nilda. It was a great game and a great time, but did you know that people still watch hockey? Me neither! Also, I now realize that I did not take very-blog friendly pictures. I blame Nilda.

The whole point in going to Philadelphia was to go to the wedding of my cousin Lisa & Jason on Sunday. (Congrats again!). Doesn't Nilda look all pretty with her straight hair? It's like dating another woman.

I then had to wake up at 5:30 on Monday, drive the rental car back to NY, go to work (like I can take a day off), then take a bus to Philadelphia that night and figure out how to take the subway to the Linc, to meet Dad, Forrest and Andrew. Long story short, it was totally worth it:

• The Philadelphia "subway" makes no sense. What the hell is a trolley doing down there?
• Forrest picked up Italian hoagies (steak sandwiches would have gotten cold and disgusting) from a place called Gooey Louie's that were absolutely incredible. Lots of meat, perfect amount of cheese, bread that gets wet from the oil and vinegar, but not soggy. Best I've ever had. Thanks, Forrest.
• A hoagie is not a sub, where you can close the roll, but is more like an open faced sandwich.
• The parking lot is like a Phish show, except with football, and where beer replaces weed.
• I need more Eagles gear.
• When the stadium announces the opposing team's players, the crowd yells "SUCKS!" after each name. Fans did the same thing at the Flyers game. They say it because it's true.
• The reality of the game was striking, after only seeing it on tv. The field was smaller and it was much quieter than what's shown on tv. Once the game started, I couldn't help but think that it looked like a high school football game. Then you realize how gigantic the stadium actually is.
• We saw Andy Reid, Brian Westbrook, Kevin Curtis, and all the other characters we see on tv. It's like they're real people.
• I don't like the Eagles fight song. There, I said it.
• My only regret is that I didn't bring my Dawkins jersey. I figured that with all the layers I'd have, it wouldn't be necessary. Of course, the weather was perfect and I spent most of the game in a sweatshirt. Curses!
• Nilda would look SO hot in a McNabb jersey.
• We've got to get to more games. Next time, we're bringing the face paint.
• And most important of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

The New TV

...is AWESOME!!! Just so you understand the grandiosity of the awesomeness of the tv (a 52" Sony Bravia XBR6 for the nerds out there), here's what we used to have:

BEFORE

Yes, that's the Obama/McCain debate. Nilda and I have been planning this tv since last last black Friday, when we got Stella's tv. This year was our turn.

This, of course, meant that we had to buy a new "media console" for the tv, and no, Brian, Ikea is not acceptable. So, we got what I have been advised is a GORGEOUS media console that my mother helped Nilda convince me to agree to. If Nilda asks, I love it. Here it is in all its glory last night after we sold the old tv on craigslist in just 24 hours (good job, Nilda!), and brought out the crappy little tv we have in the bedroom:

LAST NIGHT

Yeah, I know. Chicks dig my new media console.

So, today was the day, the tv finally came, and its awesome! We were also able to use the new blu-ray player for the first time, watching the dark knight with Stella. It's seriously unreal, I shit you not:

NOW

What makes me happiest is that for the next 3 weeks, Nilda and I will have the top of the line television on the market. Who's ready for Lost?

Things I Don't Like

Because "hate" - like "never" - is too strong a word, here's a list of things I've been working on of things that I don't like:

• People who ride unicycles for transportation.
• Slow walkers, including tourists.
• People who refuse to take off their backpacks on the subway and, as a result, take up more room than they should.
• The thought of ever living on Long Island.
• Fox News.
• Any meat cooked beyond medium.
• Breakfast meetings.
• People who feel entitled. About anything.
• Pink Floyd.
• Creationism.
• People who do not know how to properly get off of escalators.
• The end of daylight savings time.
• Winking.
• People who try to "help" by holding open a door, but wind up just standing in front of it so you can't get through.
• Using the cable tv radio as entertainment at a party.
• Having someone who screams "AM" or "Metro" and then shove a paper in my face when I'm getting off the subway.
• Mary Poppins on Broadway.
• Mohegan Sun commercials.
• Tribute bands.
• Cheap gin.
• Psych! I love cheap gin.
• Long lines at Chipotle.
• Hearing Brittany Spears whine about her life.
• Dancing.

Shoot Me Now

Nilda and I got our first REAL Christmas tree today (ie, not the plastic tree from Target). I used to say that I would never have a tree in my house. I liked that not having a tree made me different. This was before I married a catholic Cuban. I think this photo expresses my reaction to this latest development:

Twilight

Nilda has a problem. Because I'm such a wonderful and magnanimous husband, we went to see Twilight on Saturday night. Nilda had previously advised me that we would be seeing this movie, since she's been all into vampires since True Blood, a series we were both into. (I have just been advised that Nilda has been into vampires since long before True Blood). I knew I would not enjoy Twilight as much as True Blood, since its aimed at 15-year-old girls. But I had no idea of the torrent that Twilight would unleash:

• We saw Twilight on Saturday. As we speak, Nilda has read not only the first book AND the second book, but is actually on page 154 of the third book.
• Keep in mind that Nilda only had the first two books, borrowed from Harley. Thanks, Harley. Not. Nilda had to actually go out today and purchase the third AND fourth book today. I was too afraid to bring up my idea of getting a better price on Amazon, since Nilda might actually have had to wait TWO DAYS to get the books.
• Nilda told me that she took a "break" from reading today. This apparently was the time from when she finished the second book, at 1:00 am last night, to 6:30 pm this evening.
• The only reason that Nilda waited until 6:3o this evening to start the third book was because she went to see the movie AGAIN this afternoon. Time to get a job, Nilda. Don't you bring up the economy!
• Nilda reading has actually not been bad. I've been able to watch all my tv shows and even get back into my psp. It's like me time but with Nilda here.
• For years, I've been trying to get Nilda to read a book. Wicked, The Kite Runner, Dune, no luck. Who knew that the missing ingredient was teenage vampires with sexual frustration. I know, it seems so obvious when you say it out loud.
• On another note, I think the best thing I brought home from Israel was - I shit you not - chocolate with pop rocks in it. It's like eating a Nestle crunch, only to have the crunches continue after you're done with the chocolate.
• I'm dying to spoil the story for Nilda. NY Magazine had an article about spoilers written onto movie posters in the subway. Try not clicking on that link, Nilda! Just so you all know, Jacob is a werewolf.
• When Nilda was buying the books, the clerk somehow labeled them as "juvenile fiction." "It's Young Adult!," Nilda shot back.
• Apparently, Edward Cullen is the perfect man, Nilda tells me.
• Nilda, the woman who has been known to be very happy to go to sleep at 9:00, has actually been staying awake until 2:00 in the morning (!!!) to keep reading.
• Not only did I get the pleasure of sitting through the movie, but Nilda now keeps me informed on all the details that the movie didn't cover, as well as information about the author of the series. This just keeps getting better!

Black Friday

• Harley and I were out this morning at 6:30 with a mission to the Sony blu ray players on sale at Sears. We were not successful on that front, but we did all right.
• We made the rounds. We went to Sears, Kmart, Circuit City, Express, Macy's, back to Express, Dick's, Ross, Modell's and Toys 'R' Us. Yeah, I'm bad ass.
• Everywhere we went, I got the dream parking spot. It was unreal. Harley says it means that no one was out. I say that it just proves how awesome I am.
• Auntie Anne's pretzels make a fantastic breakfast.
• I called Nilda at 8:00 just to check in and let her know how I was doing. Her response: "You called me for that?" She's still pissed at me.
• My sister Caryn wants to be alone on black friday. Do NOT mess with Caryn's alone time on black friday!
• We didn't find what we wanted at the stores, but we had much better luck on line. We even ordered the blu ray player and our new tv (but that's another blog).
• Apparently, you don't need to buy expensive HMDI cables, since there's no difference from the cheap ones.
• At Modell's, we saw a young couple, a man in an Eagles jersey, the woman in an Eagles sweatshirt, looking to buy more Eagles clothing. I want to be that, Nilda.
• Nilda wants to go out again this afternoon. I'm in. Right after my nap.

The Trip To Israel

• We flew into Tel Aviv and stayed the first (and last) night there. I always hated Tel Aviv. Then I learned that it was formed by 60 Jewish families in 1909 who put a flag in a sea of sand near the old city of Jaffa and decided to make a home there led by Mayor Dizengoff. When Israel declared its Independence in 1948, Ben Gurion made the announcement in Tel Aviv (since Jerusalem was under siege) from Dizengoff's old home, now known as Independence Hall. Tel Aviv represents the vision and the balls of the early Jewish settlers of Palestine.
• Golda Meir, who was born in Minnesota and was a key early leader of Israel, eventually becoming Prime Minister of Israel, was a bad ass. Ben Gurion said of her, "She's the only man in my cabinet."
• We went to the international headquarters of the Bahai'i, some weird kind of "religion" that has its headquarters full of incredibly well-kept gardens in North Israel, in Haifa. They only accept donations from members, but members are not allowed to live in Israel where the headquarters are located. I don't get it either.
• When Dad gets hungry, he gives up all responsibility for decision-making, which, he tells me, then rests with my mother. Yet, he retains veto power over any decisions. Luckily, we had Julie to ask total strangers where was good to eat, which was usually successful.
• Our tour guide, Yehuda, was great. He was a member of the Israeli Navy and spent the 1967 war running a boat on the Sea of Galilee. He was extremely knowledgeable about everything, and clearly loves what he does. His card reads, "For you is a tour, for me is a passion."
• Yehuda is also a Scientologist who hates Arabs, women drivers, dinner and Arabs. He loves the Maccabees, a family that led a successful revolt against the Greeks, which collapsed after only 80 years after the sons could not agree on a successor. This was an obviously failed revolt to me, but Yehuda saw this as a success that lasted longer than the state of Israel has survived. Jews like to look for a victory.
• What stood out was how much agriculture there was throughout the state of Israel. From bananas to dairy farms, to fish farms, the entire country is seeded with farming.
• One of the most tense moments we had was driving through the West Bank to get to Jerusalem. We asked Yehuda if we were allowed to drive through such a hotly constested piece of land, to which he responded, "Of course! This is my land." The Israeli villages in the West Bank have fences and barbed wire for protection. Nothing happened, of course. What really struck me was how many farms there were throughout the area. Milk and honey means a good place to grow food.
• Jerusalem has always been my favorite city in the world. It's the only place where people actually care about the land itself.
• We visited the Valley of Tears, a battlefield from the 1973 Yom Kippur War where about 200 tanks held off about 1260 Syrian tanks over a three day battle. Dad and I wanted to know the tactical basis for how the Israelis were able to win under such stunning odds. All we got were that the Israelis had the higher ground. One thing I realized was that, apparently, the Arabs were terrible soldiers.
• The Bedouin Arabs, however, are great soldiers, according to Yehuda.
• There are more Christian tourists than Jewish tourists. They all want to walk in the footsteps of Jesus.
• Jesus' real name was Yeshua, which translates to Joshua. Joshua was just one of many critics who argued that Herod's grandiose temple was a mistake that put too much distance between the people and God.
• Nilda and I both caught some kind of bug in Israel that made us both sick. It turns out that when you're sick, you're less inhibited in telling people about what would normally be very personal information. Needless to say, Nilda and I pooped our brains out in Israel. Nilda blames petting the baby cow that was born that day, I've got nothing to counter with.
• Being sick, I had a lot of tea. Tea is good shit.
• We had international CNN and Fox news. Apparently, all anyone cared about was the financial crisis in the US and what kind of puppy the Obamas are going to get.
• Israeli food is Mediterranean food. You start out with a number of "salads" like hummus, tahini, eggplant, cabbage, falafel and pickled vegetables, then move on to white fish such as "sea bream" or meat like lamb or veal. The veal is not like our white veal, but more like regular beef.
• There is no such thing as "regular" coffee. You get either instant coffee or Turkish coffee, which has the grinds in it. Your best bet is to order a cappuccino.
• In the days of the Temple, religion consisted of sending an offerring to the Temple once a year. There was no synagogue or daily prayer, as the Jews were just another tribe of warriors. Finally, I feel vindicated for not going to services or keeping kosher, since my Jewish ancestors didn't give a shit about that, either.

Three Videos

Here's one of President Bush being dissed by world leaders refusing to shake his hand. Really, it's pretty sad. Maybe he had a cold or something:



Here's another one you've all probably seen, of Sarah Palin giving an interview with turkeys being slaughtered behind her. Is it wrong that this clip makes me hungry?

And here's one that Irene has up on her dashboard, whatever that is. I don't know what this is, but I want to go there. Tender!!!

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Happy Birthday To Me

So for my birthday, Nilda took me to the one restaurant that no Jewish boy from the suburbs can resist, Red Lobster. I asked Nilda to take a picture of me, but she was too cold to get the picture of the full "Red Lobster" or the 10-foot, turning lobster that's just off the to left. I tried to get a do-over, but that was quickly nixed as my "stupid picture" was not as important as getting into the nearest cab. Anyway, here's a picture of me in front of "Red." Thanks, sweetie! And yes, for Uncle Alan's knowledge, I spent way too much at Red Lobster.

Happy Birthday, Loser

Tomorrow is Andrew's birthday, so as a SPECIAL TREAT, I took a shit-load of pictures in Israel of American products re-packaged with Hebrew (or Arabic). Only a dork like Andrew would find stuff like this interesting, so here you go, dork:

Back From Israel

9 days in Israel and it's good to be home. Nilda, my parents and everyone's favorite younger-older sister Julie, had a great and busy trip, traveling through most of Israel. The only downside was that I was sick almost the entire trip. I left with a head cold that turned into a sinus infection that moved down the length of my entire body. Not to give too much info, but it's also called Immodium in Israel. I'm still not sure how to blog about it, but I figured I'd start tonight with just a few of the 400 pictures we took:

Vacation, Beeches!!

So I'm off to the holy land for vacation for a little over a week. I'll be back, with pictures. Andrew asked me to take pictures of American products with Hebrew packaging. He'd be a BALL to go on vacation with. And yes, Nilda and I are definitely wearing our Obama shirts in Israel.

The Future Of The Republican Party

Here's another article that Irene sent to me today, confirming that Palin's days as the doll of the Republican party are over. Apparently, Palin was supposed to buy just three suits, but used the opportunity to have a buying spree for her and her family. An angry aide characterized the shopping spree as "Wasilla hillbillies looting Neiman Marcus from coast to coast." The bill will end up being far more than $150,000, since she had staffers use their own credit cards for purchases, which are only now coming out as they seek reimbursement. McCain's aides never told him, because they were sure he would be offended.

I have a tremendous amount of respect for McCain refusing to let Palin speak last night, as she had asked. She would have taken the opportunity to bolster her own political future, tarnishing McCain's message of unity and reconciliation. McCain, for the first time this election, put country first.

Also, here's a great article from London (via Nilda) stating how Michelle Obama is a breakthrough first lady.

President Obama

Here's a photo that Andrew took of his tv and emailed to me. It feels good!!!

Damn, it feels good to write President Obama!! Now, I can relax, though it will take the country weeks to process the significance of what happened tonight. It's amazing to think of the kind of world that Francesca, Lacey and Lilah will grow up in.

P.S. - McCain's concession speech was better than I could have imagined. He tried to end the division and bring the country together around the new President, praising Obama when he didn't have to. Nilda cried...during a McCain speech! Hopefully, the old John McCain is back.

Live Blogging Election Night

• This campaign was brought to you by Howard Dean. Without his model focusing on grass roots organization, not reliant on the DNC, Obama would never have beaten the Clinton machine.
• Bad ass of the day: David Axelrod. He put together a brilliant campaign and stuck to his plan, making it as manager all the way through the election without being fired.
• I told you it would all come down to Pennsylvania!
• Forrest voted. Good job, Nilda!
• Schwartz said that Obama could be one of our great presidents. I shit you not! Of course, it was in the context of making Hillary sec of state. I don't think that would be a bad idea. She'd be great at any job, and it would keep her from fighting Obama in the senate.
• Pelosi has to go.
• Rachel Maddow was a Rhodes scholar from Stamford, and has a PHD in poli sci from Stanford. Who knew?
• I didn't drink last night, and now I feel sick, right before we leave for vacation. Coincidence? I think not.
• It always seems wierd when Chris Matthews calls Obama "Barak." He's not as informal with any other politician. When he starts calling him "President" or "Senator," you know Matthews is planning on running for Congress.
• The big discussion today has been about lines. I waited 45 minutes at 7:15 am, when I've never had to wait before. I thought about how Cousin Bill (at shakespeareteacher.com) is right about voting creating a sense of community.
• This will only be an "important" election if Obama wins. If McCain wins, it will be just another boring election.
• One explanation given for the faulty exit polls showing Obama winning in New Hampshire was that it was the younger voters, Obama supporters, who were more willing to talk to polsters after voting.
• It's 7:50 and I'm freaking out. But I look at http://www.fivethirtyeight.com/ and I feel better.
• The biggest surprise of the night is that I'm preferring CNN to MSNBC.
• Obama just won Pennsylvania. There are many high fives.
• Things are looking good. Hagan beat Dole, Florida looks like it's going to Obama and the portions of Indiana and Ohio that haven't reported yet are all Democratic. I say Indiana's going to McCain for sure, but Nilda's not convinced. Let's see how this turns out.

Why Obama Should Be President

This quote from Obama, taken from an interview with MTV News on November 2, demonstrates why this guy is perfect (thanks to Irene for the link!):

"I think people passing a law against people wearing sagging pants is a waste of time. We should be focused on creating jobs, improving our schools, health care, dealing with the war in Iraq, and anybody, any public official, that is worrying about sagging pants probably needs to spend some time focusing on real problems out there. Having said that, brothers should pull up their pants."

If Obama Wins

If Obama wins, because I'm still not getting my hopes up, the Democrats will criticize him for not doing enough, the conservatives will criticize him for being too liberal. There will be a failed policy initiative early in his term that the press will jump on, comparing it to Clinton's failed health care plan. There will still be terrorists, but the call of the US being the great satan will ring hollow in most of the Muslim world. Race relations in the US will not change much, but the generation born under the Obama administration will change the world. American entertainment and movies will spike in popularity, worldwide. There will be many police actions and treaties, but no wars. The nation will be polarized at home and unified abroad. History will remember this as the good old days.

Happy Halloween!!

These are pics from Halloween 2004, when Nilda and I started dating. Really, how could she resist?

Obama's Obamercial

Man , that was the best kool aid I've ever had! Delicious! I liked how, you know, it had the people? And the stories? Yeah, it was, just, you know, awesome. Seriously. It presented a concise vision of America and presented a candidate thinking on a larger scale, even if it was a little too targeted to working class whites. Obama is running as JFK trying to be FDR. Expect to hear a lot about Obama not following through on his campaign financing promise.

Stella's Back!!

Stella FINALLY came back from Florida! Stella likes to go to Miami in July, stay for the hottest part of the summer, and then come back to NY just as it's getting cold. I don't get it either. She made a pernil tonight, a roast pork shoulder that no self-respecting Jewish boy can resist. The plan was to post a picture of the delicious tref, but I couldn't wait, and the pictures of the decimated pernil just didn't do it justice. Welcome back!!

Stella also made a coconut flan, which was incredible. Nilda, would you please model the flan?






Good to see you, too, Kristen.

Vote, Forrest, Vote!

My brother-in-law Forrest lives in Montgomery County, Pennsylvania, a key battleground in the national election. He lives in one of the few places in the country where his vote actually counts. But, he doesn't want to vote. Why? Because he thinks he'll be called for jury duty. He voted in 2004 and was called soon after, so he's convinced. Let's all help guilt Forrest into voting on November 4.

The Other Humans

There's a great article in this month's National Geographic about Neanderthals. And I don't want to see any comments from "anonymous" talking about how this is a boring post, ok, Matt?

• They dominated Europe for 200,000 years, far longer than modern man has been around.
• 45,000 - 30,000 years ago, the Neanderthals shared Europe with modern man, coming out of Africa around 60,000 years ago. No no one knows why the Neanderthals went extinct, or whether the transition to modern man was peaceful.
• Neanderthals needed about 5,000 calories a day, around the same required by a participant in the Tour de France, as opposed to the normal 2,200 calories that we require.
• They do not believe that modern man descended from Neanderthals, but that they both descended from a common ancestor 700,000 years ago. There may have been some interbreeding, but too minimal to tell.
• Humans share 98.7% of the same genetic material as chimpanzees. The connection between modern man and Neanderthals was much closer.
• Neanderthals did not have the pointy chins that we have.
• All of the Neanderthal remains that have been found show signs of cannibalism, such as marks from stones, most likely from scraping.
• The total number of Neanderthals probably never exceeded more than 15,000 at a time.
• They were short, about 5 feet tall, to conserve heat, and had big rib cages to support large lungs, great for vigorous exercise. Their large muscles were leveraged for maximum strength.
• Neanderthals may have had the same vocal hardware as modern man, but know one knows for sure.
• Neanderthals may have reached maturity several years before we do, which probably significantly affected their social organization.
• They ate mostly meat. Modern man's ability to distribute the labor to survive on both hunting and agriculture may explain their success.
• They've found a gene in certain fossils that shows red hair and pale skin, leading to this recreation. The pale skin let in more sunlight to manufacture vitamin D. To see how they came up with the recreation, check this out:

Politics Should Be Boring

Here's a NYTimes video of a number of interviews that Obama did on a Chicago public-access tv show while he was state senator in Illinois. The show's host, a known conservative, actually liked Obama, noting how Obama enjoyed talking about the details of the issues, like the law professor he is. Andrew keeps saying that politics should boring, and I'm starting to think he's right.

Judith Miller Joins Fox News

Judith Miller was a NYTimes reporter for 28 years and had won the Pulitzer for a book on terrorism in 2002. That is, of course, until she became a tool of the Bush administration and published numerous articles before March 2003 reporting the dubious evidence of WMD as Iraq as if it was real. The Times, and Miller, later apologized for these articles. She garnered a lot of sympathy when she was put in jail in 2005 for refusing to reveal her source on the Valerie Plame outing, until it was revealed that she was more of a political hack supporting the Bush agenda than an independent news reporter.

Now, Miller joins the Fox News team in its never-ending quest for fair and balanced reporting, free of the bias and slime of the liberal media elite, who put politics first and the country second. Way to go, Fox News!

Just for fun, here's some quotes I cut and pasted from Slate, while I was reading Doonesbury this morning:

• "WMD -- I got it totally wrong."--New York Times reporter Judith Miller, October 16, 2005.
• "I'm deeply sorry that the stories were wrong."-- Judith Miller, Nov. 30, 2005
• "We've all had stories that didn't come out exactly as we had hoped... She has explained herself and she has nothing to apologize for."-- Fox News Senior Vice President John Moody, explaining Fox's recent hiring of Miller, Oct. 19, 2008

Live Blogging Grey's Anatomy

• Cindy McCain is not who she says she is. She's not a beer heiress, but rather the former wife of a small town reverend:

• For all the talk about Bill Ayers being a terrorist, he was named Chicago's 1997 "Citizen of the Year" for his work on school reform and is, by all accounts, a respected educator. Obama can't say any of this, of course. Defending Ayers would put Obama into bed with him.
• Ayers recently confirmed that when he said "we didn't do enough" during Vietnam, he did not mean that he wished he had done more bombing. He said that it was political propaganda, and that warnings were called in so no one was hurt. What he really meant was that we, the country, did not do enough to stop what he felt was an immoral war in Vietnam. This cartoon explains it better.
• We don't need to worry about Palin and witchcraft, since she's been sprayed for life:


• Speaking of Palin, check out http://www.palinaspresident.us, it's hilarious.
• Oh, no! There's a crisis at Seattle Grace! What a surprise! Romantic hijinks will surely ensue. And there we go.
• When I first heard that Oliver Stone was making a movie about W, I thought it would be irrelevant. Turns out, I misunderestimated the strategerific impact that The Decider has had on the country. We're seeing it tomorrow night.
• Oliver Stone originally intended Christian Bale to play W, but after spending thousands on prosthetics, Bale finally said it wouldn't work. Stone then turned to Josh Brolin, who had just been acclaimed for his role in "No Country For Old Men," who is clearly the better choice.
• This episode was directed by Eric Stoltz, the guy from "Mask"?
• It's official. My bedroom has officially become a girl's bedroom. This is what happens when I let my mom take Nilda shopping while I watch the Eagles game with Dad and Forrest:

• Nilda and I may never see eye to eye on Grey's Anatomy, but we can both agree that Haagen-Dazs Caramel Cone is the best ice cream, EVER!

Live Blogging The Final Debate

• Thank God this is the last one. Is it wrong that I'd rather watch Keith Oelberman than the debate?
• McCain's not wearing a flag pin!!!! Doesn't he love America????? Shame on him!
• If you love Joe The Plumber so much, Senator McCain, then you should marry him. Oh wait, you're against that. Yours is a love that can never be.
• In each and every debate, the candidates were asked what programs they would have to cut in response to the economic crisis. In all three times, they didn't answer the question. The country wants to be brought together by a plan that we all have to contribute to. What we really need is a tax making all gasoline $4/gallon, with all the revenue going to fund new energy sources.
• This debate is turning out to be the most interesting of the three. The format's working and they seem to really be getting into it. Cat fight!
• Obama prepared for this one. This is the best McCain has ever been (says Nilda), but I haven't seen Obama as sharp as he is tonight.
• Nilda says she should be a political analyst. "So it's Barack Obama's fault that you're running a negative campaign!" Yeah, but you have to give the illusion of objectivity, Nilda.
• Man, McCain's angry. He can barely contain himself, snarling, fidgeting, sighing loudly and interrupting both Obama and the moderator. Watch the red meat intake, Senator.
• Why is it that when McCain tries to turn positive and talk about a "brighter day for America," I suddenly get cold?
• Oh no! The question is about the running mates. Don't attack Palin! Don't attack Palin! Just talk about how great Biden is. Phew!
• Everyone's saying that no matter how the election turns out, Palin will be a star in the Republican party. I say that if McCain loses, Palin's star will fall with the campaign. She'll be the Dan Quayle of this election, a thesis paper, at best.
• An article by Mark Jacobson in this week's NY Magazine says that Palin's statement that she "didn't blink" when accepting the VP position was her Macbeth moment. That was the moment where her ambition took over since this was a bad idea.
• The article also points out that many Alaskans, although they love her, couldn't believe that Palin didn't note the Exxon Valdez decision - where the Court reduced the punitive damage award from $2.5 billion to $500 million - as one of the Supreme Court decisions she didn't agree with. This from "the energy governor."
• The debate is running behind? Shocker.
• Obama really seems like he gets the big picture. He's smart and understands both sides and can make a decision about what the best course is. Or maybe it's just the Obama t-shirt I'm wearing.
• Maybe comparing Obama to Hoover in the election of 1932 isn't a great idea, McCain. Hoover was a Republican unable to deal with a financial crisis, who then lost by a landslide to FDR, a Democrat who brought us the New Deal. Which one do you think you are in this scenario?
• Don't believe the polls. This election is far from over and there is no guarantee that Obama would win if the election was today. The real danger is that people will think Obama's got it in the bag and won't turn out to vote. My job is to get Forrest to vote. After convincing me to pick Miami over Houston in last week's football pool, its the least he can do.
• Upholding Roe v. Wade is a proper litmus test for any judicial nominee.
• Thanks for bringing up Ledbetter, Obama, the Supreme Court decision prohibiting a woman paid less than her male co-workers for 20 years from going to court. I think you all know how I feel about that decision.
• Nilda is horrified - horrified! - that I would check the score of the Phillies game. "But you don't like baseball!" I know, but if the Phillies win, they're in the World Series. Horrified that she'd have to suffer through another sport, in addition to football! Let's hope, for her sake, that the Flyers don't have a good season.
• This is the first debate where I thought Obama was the clear winner. He was calm and was well prepared on all the issues, so much so that McCain was clearly pissed off at all the zingers. McCain was good, but Obama was better. Of course, the tv pundits haven't come on yet, so I don't know what to think yet.

Because It's Worth Repeating

Thanks, Jen Simon (of "Never Follow A Hippie To A Second Location" fame), for finally bearing the truth.

Once In A Lifetime

This song has been in the trailer for the "W" movie and I haven't been able to get it out of my head. It was written by David Byrne and Brian Eno based on a preacher that they heard on the radio while driving through New York. The video was choreographed by Toni Basil, of the song "Mickey" fame, and has Byrne acting like a marionette. Basil had Byrne watch footage of epileptic seizures to prepare. The song was named one of the 100 most important American musical works of the 20th century by NPR.



This is my second Talking Heads blog post in a week. The irony is that I can't listen to too much of them in one sitting. They get boring. Not as boring as Pink Floyd, but that's another story.

P.S. - Nilda asked, "Why is the post called 'Once In A Lifetime'? Is that the name of the song?" Good job, Nilda. Good job.

Happy Yom Kippur!

Best Song Ever

There will be no live blogging the debate tonight. Rough day in court, so I'm getting drunk and making cornflake chicken.

Saturday At The Movies

I Read two interesting things in the NYTimes this weekend waiting for Vicky Christina Barcelona to start:

• The term "maverick" comes from Samuel Augustus Maverick, a Texas rancher in the 1800s who refused to brand his cattle. A "maverick" then became a term for anyone who did not bear another’s brand. Terrellita Maverick, now 82-years-old, is "enraged" that McCain calls himself a maverick. She said, "It’s just incredible — the nerve! — to suggest that he’s not part of that Republican herd. Every time we hear it, all my children and I and all my family shrink a little and say, ‘Oh, my God, he said it again.’ ”

• Maureen Dowd wrote, "Navy Seals are elite, and they get lots of training so they can swim underwater and invade a foreign country, but if you’re governing the country that dispatches the Seals, it’s not O.K. to be elite?"

So here I am, sitting in an independent movie theater, on the Upper West Side, at a Woody Allen movie (which was great), reading the NYTimes, on my iphone, wearing an Obama t-shirt, thinking, when did I become a liberal stereotype?

A Conversation With Matt

Palin's Debate Cheat Sheet

Live Blogging The VP Debate

• Nilda and I didn't get to watch the first debate until two days later, now we're watching it live. How am I supposed to know what's going on if I don't have a pundit to tell me?
• Biden coming out connecting the need for the bailout to the failures of the Bush administration was brilliant and is exactly what Obama should have done to McCain.
• Palin looks terrified. Nilda has paused the debate to explain to me how she can't stand to look at her. Nilda's now mumbling something about soccer moms. May I please listen to the program, now? Thanks!
• Is it wrong for me to comment on Sarah Palin's tush? Probably...
• Nilda just told me to calm down in talking about how great Biden is doing, and how well he's focusing the debate on the economy. This coming from the woman who hasn't shut up since the debate started.
• Nilda wants a co-producer credit for this blog.
• Here's a great video of a senior AFL-CIO leader stating why racism should play no role in the decision to vote for Obama.
• Nilda just asked if my post was funny, or long and rambling. So's your face, Nilda. So's your face.
• Nilda has just ordered me to pay attention to Palin's face and her run on sentences and how "there isn't a period anywhere in what she's saying!"
• They released the opening scene to the Watchmen movie coming out in March. Check it out.
• If John McCain wins, then it's truly God's plan. Like the flood.
• There is a rumor that Palin's son enlisted in Iraq to avoid jail time for vandalizing the brakes on school buses. I could not find any support whatsoever for this, other than this article in the Juneau Empire about vandalized school buses in Anchorage, with no mention of who was accused. If a story this juicy was true, I'd have to believe the press would have already run it.
• Hey, Sarah, thanks for reminding everyone that Biden has a "passion" for education and that his wife has been a teacher for 30 years! Breathe, Nilda.
• How are you doing at Palin Bingo?
• Run! Run! Reform is coming!
• After Biden made a compelling call for action in Darfur, Palin ducked the question by going back to the vote for the war in Iraq. After Biden clearly set forth how he differed from McCain and the administration on the war and how it was run, you could totally tell she was thinking, "I'm gonna vote for this guy."
• Biden was definitely a better choice than Hillary. A guy I met at a party said that Biden guaranteed Pennsylvania for Obama. I'm starting to think he was right.
• You can see Biden having a real role in an Obama administration. Palin will have as much responsibility as the winner of The Apprentice.
• If I ever smile as much as Sarah Palin has tonight, give me some more of whatever drugs I just took.
• I don't get the people who say they'll leave the country if McCain is elected. No matter what happens, we'll still be better off then under Bush. Unless, of course, Palin becomes President. Then we're fucked.
• The pundits seem to think it was a tie. I never realized how far they go to make it appear close, just so there's a story.
• I'm psyched to see the W movie now, after seeing the trailer for the first time.
• This was fun! Goodnight, everybody!

The Big Crunch

New theory of the evolution of the cosmos! The Big Crunch predicts that space is ... are you feeling all right? ... made up of "spacetime atoms." When in open space, they're undetectable, but when ... hey, wake up ... there is a lot of energy in a small area, they repel each other, like a sponge that has too much water repels more water. No, stay awake, you need to hear this! This means that when gravity causes the universe to contract, nearing a big bang, and there is a high amount of energy in a small area, this repulsion limits hwo far space can contract. This means that the big bang would not be a singularity - no space between matter, like inside a black hole. Wake up! Space contracts, but only so much as to create a "bounce" into a new big bang. Do you need coffee? Everything just gets "crunched" together, in an endless cycle of expansion and contraction. Ok, you can press play now.

Happy Birthday, Nilda!!!

Everyone rejoice, for today is Nilda's birthday, and I, as the good husband I am directed to be, am writing a blog post to celebrate. Not only is Nilda lucky enough to have her 30th on Rosh Hashanah (she hates honey, so the apples and honey thing ain't gonna happen), but she's lucky enough to be married to me. Truly, her cuppeth runneth overeth.

Nilda is kind, compassionate, caring, tough but sensitive and stunningly gorgeous. In short, she is the hottest schikza I've ever seen. She proof reads my blogs for me, helps me pick out my clothes (colors are hard), and cooks the most amazing meals you've ever had. She makes me a better person and makes this blog a lot better. She is truly amazing and I realize every day how lucky I am to be married to her. Thanks for the post-it note reminders, sweetie.

Parody Or Reality?

The Today Show this morning had a side-by-side comparison of Palin's actual interview with Katie Couric and the parody on SNL. It's uncanny how accurate Tina Fey was. Hurry, due to NBC's vigilance of its proprietary material, the link won't last for long!

Ledbetter For Obama

Remember that blog post i did about the Supreme Court's decision in Ledbetter, where the Court held that a woman who was paid less than her male counterparts for 20 years couldn't go sue because the statute of limitations has passed? Well, Ledbetter herself has a video out now supporting Obama over McCain:

The reasoning of the Court's decision wasn't all bad, even if the end result was, but it's good to see that an employment discrimination victim who loses can still have some impact.

Best Onion Article Ever

Point: Gov. Palin Has No Foreign Policy Experience, Refuses To Acknowledge Global Warming, And Supports The War In Iraq

Counterpoint: Please Keep Your Voice Down, My Poor Retarded Child Is Sleeping

I'm Not Going To Puss Out And Call This "Untitled"

• My work week is very busy, and the UN General Assembly is meeting this week. Coincidence?
• I doesn't mean anything when Obama's up in the polls, since he'll be down next week and it'll keep going up and down before the election. But damn does it feel good when he's up in the polls.
• I don't want to read or write about Sarah Palin, but she's just so damn interesting I can't help myself. As bad of a pick she is, as much as she reminds me of Harriet Meyers, she's the smartest thing McCain has done this election. I want a Sarah Palin action figure for my office.
• Fringe = X Files. I didn't watch X Files, and I don't want to watch Fringe either, Nilda. But I can't say anything because she still hasn't forgiven me for making her sit through the first hour of Speed Racer.
• Time Warner Cable now has a feature where the caller ID comes up on the tv. This is big news in our house.
• Hey white blue collar worker, when they tell you that the country is run by liberal elites, THEY'RE MANIPULATING YOU!!
• Jen Simon finally has a blog, bringing you glorious hits such as this.
• Nilda and I were walking through a street fair on the Upper West Side on Sunday, when we saw a group of about 50 people walking through with McCain paraphernalia everywhere. Luckily, we were both decked out in our Obama shirts. Everyone around us started screaming O-ba-ma as they walked by (not me of course, I don't campaign), especially this almost-retired couple that were really pissed. I couldn't stop thinking about the older African-American man walking in support of McCain. What's his deal?
• Blogging has suddenly become hard. I've apparently run out of ideas and motivation.
• I said "hard."

Update

Yes, I have been negligent in my blogging lately. Here's an update, because the world needs to know.

• Matt & Mary are moving to Minneapolis. We wish them well, but recognize that this means the apocolypse is truly upon us.
• I watched the first half of the awesome Philadelphia/Dallas game at Andrew's on Monday night. Lilah couldn't tell the difference between us. She called me "dada" and said "yes" when asked if there were "two daddys." She's awesome.
• My iphone is everything I wanted it to be. I'm never going back.
• The cable went out last night. This meant that we lost not only tv, but our internet connection, telephone and scheduled dvr shows, making it a crisis that is at least on par with the collapse of AIG. At least I was able to check the NYTimes from my iphone. Still, there's no coverage from the liberal, elistist media.
• The best description I've heard of Sarah Palin is that she's the mean cheerleader at school. No, wait. The best description I've heard is that you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit.
• I couldn't get "tell me what you want, what you really, really want out" out of my head yesterday. It was horrible.
• Modern man came out of Africa about 100,000 years ago. Modern civilization started in Mesopotamia 12,000 years ago. Writing developed 5,500 years ago. Friday night, all of that progress came to an end as Nilda and I suffered through 10,000 BC.

True Love

Yes, I got my iPhone on Saturday. I braved Hurricane Hanna to get to the Apple Store, but I did it, dragging Nilda all the way, soaked shoes and all. We had to go to Crate & Barrel afterwards ("There's a fabric sale, Brian!"), but it was worth it. There wasn't even a line, like I was expecting. I was in and out within a half an hour. Naturally, the one I got was defective and wouldn't load applications, but four days and two restores later and it's like new. Except not broken.

So I have it, and I love it. I luuuuuuuv it. I spent Saturday night loading my contacts and preferences and haven't stopped playing with it since. I want to check movie times in the park, I got it. I want to check football scores, right there. I want to prove to Nilda that I'm right about something, I'll hold off on that because that can backfire. But Virginia is totally longer than New Jersey and you know it.

Censored Book Of The Month Club

Man, I had a good post. Mom forwarded me an email listing all of the books Sarah Palin sought to ban from the Wasilla Public Library when she was mayor. I had it all written up, listing about 30 books, then I decided to get a link to prove that it was true. It is not.

The good news is that the truth is just as interesting. After Palin first became mayor of Wasilla, she asked the city librarian, in the post for seven years, if she would be all right with censoring certain library books. The librarian said she would not, and then was joyously greeted a few months later with a letter from Palin telling her she would be fired. Apparently, Palin thought the librarian did not fully support her, and no one can keep a librarian who doesn't fully support the mayor. A public outcry led to the librarian keeping her job.

The list that's been circulating on email of the books Sarah Palin sought to ban is actually a list of all the books that have ever been banned in the US. Some of the books, including the Harry Potter books, were not even in existence at the time that Palin was mayor of Wasilla.

So thanks, Sarah. Thanks for ruining a blog that I spent 10 whole minutes working on. You ruin everything!

Still, you have to love that the Republicans have chosen a VP candidate who supports censoring books in public libraries. U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!!

Live Blogging Palin

• I can't watch this crap.
• When you've got a VP candidate no one knows, it's a good idea to let Gulliani speak so long that you can't show the video introducing her to the country. Good thinking, Republicans!
• Cindy McCain is scary. If I keep watching, I'm going to have nightmares.
• Bristol Palin is cute because you know she puts out.
• Sometimes I think I could support Palin. Then she talks.
• History shows that the country's economy has grown stronger and faster under the Democrats than the Republicans.
• Palin opposed the bridge to nowhere, after she had first supported it. What she doesn't tell you is that she opposed the bridge AFTER she got, and kept, the money.
• Nilda has had enough of whatever it is Palin is doing with her nose and teeth. I've had enough of Palin.
• Three days until I get my iphone!