Monday, March 3, 2008
A Baby Carriage Bill of Rights
Oh, I'm sorry, did I block the sidewalk right in your path? I apologize for the inconvenience, but, as you see, I have a baby carriage. Therefore, I can do whatever I want. You see, having a baby carriage gives me certain privileges that you, as a mere non-baby carriage civilian, cannot enjoy. Should I be required to stop abruptly in the middle of traffic because I decided that I need something RIGHT NOW, you will simply have to wait. In fact, you can tell that what I'm doing is really, really important because of the sheer girth of my particular baby carriage. Maybe one day - if you're lucky - you will own a baby carriage, and the accompanying right to own the sidewalk. Until then, please get out of my way and accept your place as a second-class, non-baby carriage pushing sucker. And sorry for the inconvenience.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
I guess you borrowed my daughter and her baby carriage yesterday while I was shopping :)
Feels pretty f-ing awesome, huh???
Actually, the "bill of rights" is a sarcastic rant about the self-absorbed mommies with "tanks" (as we like to call them) that almost ran us down on the UWS this weekend. You have to borrow a baby and a dog just to fit in in that neighborhood (among others: UES, Park Slope) Move over tank mommies, B&N don't yield for strollers! ha ha
Better watch what you're saying about strollers or I'll run you over with my minivan. And I'll make sure I get a good look at your bloody carcass in the rear-view camera.
As long as that minivan is a hybrid.
If you dont yield, then you'd better watch out!
Oh, M&M, the Slope has gotten even worse since you've moved away!
(That's "even worse" from a non-carriaging perspective, natch.)
So you mean that it's gotten even better, then?
Post a Comment