In my ongoing efforts to be romantic, I took Nilda to see District 9 this weekend. It was a smart, thought-out movie that was well made and did not get boring. Even the plot holes (human and aliens understanding each other but each speaking their respective languages) seemed to make sense, somehow. The political allegory was there yet not overdone, and I loved it. Nilda, not so much.
Nilda, throughout the movie, entertained both myself and our fellow movie-goers with a running commentary on why the move was, and I quote, "the worst movie of all time." Ugly looking aliens that Nilda cannot look at + a shit load of gore = NOT NILDA'S MOVIE. As punishment, Nilda made me go see GI Joe the very next day. Two movies in two days seems like a lot, yes, but Nilda, apparently, had to get rid of the "bad taste" she had from District 9.
GI Joe was horrendous. It was not that it was stupid, with obvious plot holes and horrid acting. That was to be expected. This movie has made clear that no one, ever, should actually say, in any form of seriousness, any of the following:
- "The Joes won't know what's coming."
- "Knowing is half the battle."
- "It's all up to the Joes, now."
- "Are they Joes?"
Worst of all, I had to sit there and watch Adebisi from Oz say, "Yo Joe," and be serious about it. (Oddly missing was someone yelling "Cobra!," which I guess even this terrible movie couldn't pull off.) I don't know if I'll ever recover.
Nilda tells me that District 9 was "so bad" that she gets credit for two more of her movies. I appealed, saying that I had gone to see Twilight with her, which only led to Nilda declaring that I would be seeing New Moon with her, in addition to some other movie, probably starring Katherine Heigl. I am in trouble.
6 comments:
It looks terrible. But it must have been better than Transformers 2. That was worse than fucking the decaying corpse of a giant dragonfly. But hey, a movie is a movie!
Love the Adebisi reference.
Nil! District 9 has an 88 on Rotten Tomatoes!! That's really good! (G.I. Joe has a 38. That is considerably less good!) What do you have against shrimp, anyway? ;-)
(Also, it was a PARABLE! For APARTHEID! That's totally DEEP.)
In other news, Bri, go read this (particularly the last part of it) right now!!
Also, speaking of "worst movies of all time," I reiterate that Into the Wild made License to Wed seem like a really awesome movie.
it was not lost on me that it was supposed to be an allegory regarding apartheid, but I hate to tell you, it didn't succeed, the allegory is just an excuse for it's lameness!
"Nobody puts baby panda in the corner!!!"
Yay!! Andrew, you're right; I should have told both of you to go there!
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