Lessons For Charlie

• Never cut your own hair.
• Take a picture before you unplug any cables.
• Bring enough socks.
• Learn how to speak Spanish, because you can.  Also, comebacks in Spanish are way cooler. 
• Send back an overcooked steak. If the second steak is still overcooked, blame the restaurant.  
• You can't ever be 100% certain of anything, so don't tell people you are.
• Never travel with more than you can carry.
• Don't try to catch a falling knife. Just get your feet out of the way.
• Never buy cheap trash bags or paper towels.
• If a woman ever asks you what the temperature is outside, say, "It's cold." 
• Don't buy anything on a credit card unless you already have the money to pay for it.
• Sometimes the first answer you get is the final answer. Usually, it's not.
• When you're on a roll, don't mess it up.
• It's never bad to see the humor in situations. It can be bad to share that humor.
• Learn the appropriate use of fakakta.
• Don't go down every rabbit hole you find. 
• If they have fried yuca on the menu, order it.
• Don't go into finance.
• Never spend money on an app you downloaded for free.
• If you're ever stopped by the police, keep your mouth shut and ask for a lawyer.  If they ask permission to search you or the car, say no.  
• Never put naked pictures of yourself or anyone else on the Internet.
• The most powerful emotion is guilt.
• Like Albert Brooks said in Defending Your Life, life on Earth is all about overcoming fear.
• When all else fails, make a scene.
• Mommy and Daddy will always love you, no matter what.
• Stay gold, Ponyboy.