We're just under two weeks until the kid comes and Nilda is ready. She wants this kid out! Don't tell her I said this, but I'm pretty sure this kid is going to be late. I've trained Nilda that if she texts me to call her, she has to say everything is ok. Anyone who knows Nilda knows that we're in the final preparation stages. It's Jewish superstition not to do anything for the baby until the baby is actually born. Nilda's response is that she's not Jewish.
We washed a whole lot of baby clothes over the holiday weekend. I thought baby laundry would be easier than regular laundry because more fits in each load. But this is a trick because that only means there's a lot more little and annoying things to fold.
We wanted to make sure the car seat fit in the car. And after just 20 minutes of cursing, sweating and blaming Nilda for looking at me wrong, I got the god damn car seat in the god damn car.
There are a ton of baby toys that I somehow know about. Between the themes of rainforest, ocean, barn yard and space, space is obviously the way to go. Check out this valance that I installed.
This remarkable job proves that I am ready for fatherhood. I don't really know what a valance is, but this is impressive work. See, Mom, I am handy. Here's the new shower head I installed.
This was especially impressive since I broke the previous shower head by trying to adjust what, apparently, was not adjustable. I have already warned Nilda that a hand-held shower head means there will be water on the ceiling. These are our present sleeping arrangements, featuring my wonderful aerobed.
People say to me, "Why do you sleep in an aerobed?" The answer is because it's awesome. It is SO much better than sleeping in the bed with Nilda. In the bed, Nilda's either flopping around and huffing and puffing, or is pissed off at me for breathing. And the separate covers I need to use because Nilda's always hot, keep falling off the bed. You'd sleep on the areobed, too.
Lamb Lamb wants to escape.
We washed a whole lot of baby clothes over the holiday weekend. I thought baby laundry would be easier than regular laundry because more fits in each load. But this is a trick because that only means there's a lot more little and annoying things to fold.
We wanted to make sure the car seat fit in the car. And after just 20 minutes of cursing, sweating and blaming Nilda for looking at me wrong, I got the god damn car seat in the god damn car.
There are a ton of baby toys that I somehow know about. Between the themes of rainforest, ocean, barn yard and space, space is obviously the way to go. Check out this valance that I installed.
This remarkable job proves that I am ready for fatherhood. I don't really know what a valance is, but this is impressive work. See, Mom, I am handy. Here's the new shower head I installed.
This was especially impressive since I broke the previous shower head by trying to adjust what, apparently, was not adjustable. I have already warned Nilda that a hand-held shower head means there will be water on the ceiling. These are our present sleeping arrangements, featuring my wonderful aerobed.
People say to me, "Why do you sleep in an aerobed?" The answer is because it's awesome. It is SO much better than sleeping in the bed with Nilda. In the bed, Nilda's either flopping around and huffing and puffing, or is pissed off at me for breathing. And the separate covers I need to use because Nilda's always hot, keep falling off the bed. You'd sleep on the areobed, too.Lamb Lamb wants to escape.
2 comments:
Apparently once you become a dad, you gain "Dad Strength." So I think you'd better get prepared to start breaking even bigger and more impressive things.
Maybe it's time for a new post? :)*
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