- RULE #1: When, at 12:30 am, after a night of drinking beer, then wine, then gin & tonics, it is NOT a good idea to switch to rum & cokes. 12:30 should be your turn around time.
- Should you fail to adhere to this RULE #1, be prepared to clean up rum & coke colored vomit in the morning.
- Should you delegate cleaning up said vomit to your wife, be prepared to offer her jewelry to compensate her.
- Waking up and not remembering how you got there is as fun as it sounds.
- Don't have a bagel and orange juice after you just threw up. Not a good idea.
- Leave the chip bowl on the coffee table overnight, so that it will be right near the sofa the next morning, just in case. Be prepared to buy Nilda a new chip bowl.
- Its better to throw up ginger ale or Sprite than to throw up nothing at all.
- It might make sense to think that you've got a virus, but its more likely that you're just really hungover, or have alcohol poisoning.
- Lord of the Rings is an amazing trilogy.
- Have the saltines & chicken soup. Nilda is right.
- Yes, you are actually dying.
- Julie is my sister and I love her.
- I am advised that I still can't take down cousin Bill.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
What I Learned From Blacking Out At Our Annual Holiday Party
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4 comments:
Classic. Fucking classic.
I spent Sunday watching LOTR also. I *heart* HD.
THIS from the man who recently made partner! ugh! I fully expect you to honor your promise of jewelry and do not want to hear any intoxication defenses!
Hm! If Nilda's getting jewelry you probably owe me something better than a magazine subscription in retroactive compensation for the last time your puke was scrubbed up.....Your SIL
Awwww, B Dub. We're really gonna have to work on your tolerance, aren't we?
Also, don't you know not to antagonize a Shakespeare scholar, lest he go medieval on yo' azz?
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